so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
