Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
