the new term for farting is butt boxing.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
