We won't sleep together?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
