You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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