I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
