Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
