Just mADE A PArabola og urine
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
