1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
These tits shall not be calmed
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
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