In the future we'll all be gay
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Found the puke drawer
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
not ubering you a puppy
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