Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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