if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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