If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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