Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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