Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Randomize
