i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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