I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
be right there i have to get my cape
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
