brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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