I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize