I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize