dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
