You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
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