so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
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it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
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We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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