i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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