Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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