Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
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The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
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Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize