I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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