you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
