First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize