I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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