You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
