Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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