I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
