Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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