Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
