i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
