She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize