last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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