I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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