Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
This is not my ceiling
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't judge my taste in strippers
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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