I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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