She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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