honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
