Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
