I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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