He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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