Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
