hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
