i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
