I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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