Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize